Why causes a cheating man? Men, sexuality & commitment.
Although there are many contributing factors why relationships go through a breakup, when it came to men, there are 15 primary reasons as to what causes a man to cheat – according to a five year study called The Couples Project.
The Couples Project Study discussed:
– Why is the occurrence of a cheating man so prevalent?
– Why do 65% of marriages not last?
– Why do the majority of relationships never make it to the marriage stage?
The study included over 500 men and focused on men and sex in committed relationships. The objective was not to influence behaviour, such as counselling does but instead to learn what was the motivation behind the behaviour men were displaying that was causing them in many instances to be cheating men.
The study on men & sex covered topics such as:
– What attracts you and how important is it to you?
– Is it important enough to cause you to become a cheating man?
– Does your partner really know your sexual needs?
– Do you feel you can honestly discuss the topic of sex in detail with your partner?
And most importantly, the study included open ended questions such as; what is the reference point you wish your partner had concerning men and sex that would allow you to truly connect on this matter. In other words, what do you wish your partner already understood concerning sex?
Some of the findings were surprising:
- 89% of men felt their partner did not really know them when it came to their sexuality.
- When a man initiated a break up, he usually disguised the reason into something else if it had to do with sex.
- Men terminate relationships because they feel their needs weren’t met
- They feel they cannot even honestly discuss the topic with their partner.
- They disguised the reason for the breakup, probably leaving their partner confused.
And worse still, this cycle seems to be learned and repeated over and over.
The study also evaluated the accuracy of some broadly held beliefs including the concept of a female needing the perfect body to keep a man attracted.
Or, if she does not have that ever evasive body, she needs to keep a vigilant watch on her physique and keep her man’s options closed so he won’t wander.
Surprisingly, the Couples Project concluded that from a man’s point of view, both of these assumptions were false.
So what causes a cheating man?
Good question and one that was not really addressed in detail in this study but the following 15 theories were courted as being the major precursors to cheating:
- A simple desire to have sex with someone else can motivate some people
- To fulfil unmet sexual needs
- Opportunity presents itself unplanned
- Porn addiction
- Inability to resolve partnership problems
- Substance abuse
- Feeling unwanted
- Out of site out of mind
- Lack of intellect
- Loss of physical attraction
- A means to end the relationship
- Falling out of love
- Predominately however it’s an emotional disconnect from their partner
Edit – More information on: What Men Wont Tell Women About Sex – Men Sexuality and Relationships used to be available at www.CouplesProject.org – however the domain is down so new link will be made available if located.
Need some free help with your relationship – try the following links:
http://www.askmen.com/dating/index.html – free advice on dating.
http://www.realsexedfacts.com/ – place for teens when too embarrassed to ask parents
https://www.askapril.com/advice-column – dating advice, marriage advice, and advice for intimacy topics
https://relationup.com/adviceforum/main-forum/ – free forums staffed by relationship experts
https://www.aarp.org/home-family/sex-intimacy/info-2015/couples-marriage-relationship-advice-schwartz.html – offers relationship advice specific to people of retirement age
http://relationshipadvicechat.net/ – relationship advice resource full of helpful articles
https://socialnetworking.lovetoknow.com/Safe_Chat_Rooms – get free advice from non-experts
https://www.7cups.com/relationship-advice-chat-room/ – trained volunteer “listeners,” that can help
https://www.loveisrespect.org/for-yourself/contact-us/ – geared toward teens and people in their early 20s
https://www.iprevail.com/ – trained peer listeners
https://www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/talk-someone/live-chat-counsellor – free service where you can chat online with a counsellor for about half an hr.