Are you scanning your surroundings trying to figure out how to make a homemade vagina?
Well stop!
Help has arrived, thanks to the internet and a number of (presumably) male earthlings in times of horniness, who have conjured up some ingenious DIY pocket pussies that will answer natures call – to action!
Those on the lookout for a low-priced real McCoy stroker, take a gander at the 10 best cheap Fleshlights that keep on giving. Shlurpy stuff.
For constructing one however, here are 12 tried and tested methods for creating a homemade vagina that you will be able to appreciate old boy.
How to Make a Pocket Pussy – 12 Homemade Designs
Method 1 – Towel
What you’ll need:
- A towel – preferably one just pulled out of the tumble-dryer
- One rubber glove, something similar in length to your penis that can be used as a placeholder
- Two elastic bands
- Some lube of your choice (a few rain drop sized portions of cooking oil will suffice or a water-based lube)
How to make a homemade vagina using a towel:
1. Lay the glove and a penis-like object (carrot/cucumber/oblong type object) down at one end of the towel – allow it to hang over the edge by one inch.
2. Roll the towel around it, hold it in place with an elastic band at the end where the glove’s fingertips are positioned – make this part as tight as you can.
3. At the orifice end, carefully remove the penis-like object and pull and stretch the end of the glove out over the end of the towel.
4. Hold all this in place with the second elastic band – looser this time.
This will create the sensation of muscles tightening around your member as you enter, but not too tight so nothing may pass.
5. Add your chosen lube and delve in. You could try positioning it between your mattress and bed base or couch cushions. Locking the door to avoid being rumbled goes without saying.
Method 2 – Warm sponges, plastic sandwich bag & a pint glass
What you’ll need:
- 2 sponges – moist wet in a preferably plastic sized pint glass
- pint glass/plastic container
- plastic sandwich bag/freezer bag
- water based lube
How to homemade pocket pussy using sponges, glass & a sandwich bag:
1. Run two sponges under some warm water to heat up.
2. Place each sponge inside a pint glass.
3. Feed in a deep plastic sandwich bag in-between the two sponges & with the remaining entrance of the bag sitting proud, turn it inside out & peel it back around the opening the glass.
4. All 100% reusable & recyclable.
Method 3 – Cylindrical container
What you’ll need:
- A cup or bottle with the top cut off
- A cylindrical container of your choice
- 2 to 3 sponges
- A glove again
- As well as two elastic bands and some lube
- Soak the sponges with hot water so they’ll be moist and warm when all is in place
How to construct a homemade vagina within a cylindrical container:
1. Lay the glove between the sponges and then place one elastic band around the sponge/glove package if you like to create a sandwich.
2. Next, place the sandwich into the container and stretch out the open end of the glove up and around the container.
3. Place the second rubber band around the turned back glove which grips the container to secure.
To conclude, add lube and enjoy.
Method 4 – Leg of ham or large porkchop
What you’ll need:
- Rump of lamb/thick porkchop
- Slices of ham from the fridge as pork is cured, so bacteria free
How to recreate the warmth & feel of a vagina using a rump of ham:
1. Dig out a chamber proportionate to your size with sharp knife
2. Lube up with cooking oil of choice
3. Alternatively place freezer bag inside for hygiene and trapping lube moisturizer
It is suggested in some quarters to use a whole leg or joint, and to dig out the length and girth required.
This would be a big waste as it’s not reusable, so rather if you can get your hands on some long slices of ham, that stretch full shaft length, this is ideal.
As one ham and masturbation thread explains, you slather the inside of the ham wrap with a lube of choice.
A type of cooking oil is a preferred lubricant of choice (not mayonnaise), and thrum away.
On 4chan it is said that a pork chop provides more stoic resistance.
For added pleasure, heat it up first.
Method 5 – Toilet roll
What you’ll need:
- Toilet roll
- Rubber glove
- Elastic band
- Lube
How to make a toy vagina using a toilet roll:
1. Remove the cardboard from the roll
2. Reinsert a rubber glove
3. Turn back the sleeve so that it can then be secured with the elastic band. The fastest and most straight forward method perhaps.
4. Lube and self-pleasure.
Method 6 – Banana peel
What you’ll need:
- A banana skin
- Sellotape
How to simulate the feel of a pocket pussy using a banana peel:
1. Find a banana, cut off one end and wrap the entire banana in electrical tape or Sellotape.
2. Hollow out the banana insides, pop it in the microwave for 10 seconds and you’re good to go, leaving your manhood smelling like a fruit bar.
A super quickie, the banana peel method is simple and semi-effective for making a homemade vagina of sorts, however with more natural simulation than a sponge.
Method 7 – Bubble wrap
What you’ll need:
- 2 pieces of bubble wrap
- 2 sponges
- 1 elastic band
- Container
- Lube
How to make a toy vagina using bubble wrap:
1. Wrap each piece of bubble wrap around each sponge.
2. Place glove inside.
3. Secure with rubber band.
4. Place in container and lube.
Method 8 – A nopal cactus (prickly pear leaves)
What you’ll need:
- One nopal cactus pad
- Sharp knife
- Heating tool
How to make a moist DIY vagina using the juices from the nopal cactus:
1. You first carefully remove the thorns using tweezers from a large leaf or pad, one long enough to allow for you inside, then place over an open fire or the oven hob for a second or two on either side, so as to char off any remaining thorns.
2. Then take a knife and remove the bottom and gently prize open a section in between the “halves” of the cactus pad, big enough for you.
3. You now have a homemade self-lubricating male pleasure toy which could really mimic a mouth or a vagina.
4. Be careful it’s not too hot or the molten aloe vera juice may burn your boys.
Yup, it’s a risky procedure but this aloe vera cactus is self lubricating so the most hygienic and natural of all methods listed here one might add.
See – 4chanarchives.com/board/b/thread/682155296
Method 9 – Floral beads
What you’ll need:
- Floral beads or a food/fruit/vegetable of your choice
- Rubber glove
- Elastic band
- Lube
- Container
How to construct a homemade vagina using floral beads:
Apparently these containers of floral beads can be purchased at a dollar store in the US or Poundland perhaps in the UK.
1. Place the glove over the top, secure it with band, then push inside container turning the glove inside out and lube up.
2. Similar sensations can be experienced using a cup of black beans, mushed up bananas, grapes, etc are all ways in which to add to texture and feeling. Something warmed up will enhance your homemade vagina.
Method 10 – Jelly in a bowl
What you’ll need:
- Cooking jelly
- 1 microwaveable (optional) erect penis-sized container
How to make a rudimentary homemade pocket pussy using jelly:
1. Mix up some jelly as instructed on your pack.
2. Pour into an erect penis-sized container (preferably microwaveable).
3. Sink in and enjoy.
For friction and suction, jelly has some fantastic gripping qualities. It’s also very cheap and easy to prepare.
Jelly can be heated which is one advantage and when set in a container that can be placed in a microwave, thrusting in and out of a warm jelly mix delivers an amazing, all-encompassing love tunnel feeling, that very few household vagina making materials can replicate.
Cold jelly fresh out the fridge however can additionally deliver a trembling, shuddering pleasure, but maybe a bit close to necrophilia.
Method 11 – Stuffed animal
What you’ll need:
- A stuffed animal (on the way out)
- String
- Condom
- Lube
How to make a homemade vagina using a stuffed animal:
1. Bit weird but performs a functionary role. Find an opening or create one in a stuffed furry animal.
2. Place a condom on and go to town or you can hog tie the legs and arms together and try this method by inserting within this chamber of space.
Again, not the best look should you be caught out but effective.
Method 12 – A blown-up latex glove
What you’ll need:
- A latex glove
- Lube
How to make a latex glove homemade vagina:
1. Tie a knot at the base end of the thumb and little finger.
2. Turn the glove inside out with the 3 remaining digits hanging loose.
3. Blow into it and then pull the middle finger back through the opening of the glove.
4. Tie it in a knot
5. Pull out each of the remaining two fingers, slice the top off one end and then blow into it to inflate.
6. Once the glove is inflated and plump, pull each digit around the what know appears to be the shape of a butt and tie to secure airhole.
Best to watch the vid below in the final minute to get the full picture.
Quite creative and ingenious for a person to discover. The end result is fascinating!
Lube up and delve in.
Homemade vagina pleasuring tips!
● Like a Fleshlight, whichever method you choose, having the ability to warm up your homemade vagina will amplify pleasure levels.
● The spongy design works well with holding moisture and keeping the remaining water lukewarm throughout.
● Homemade sex toys also provide relief for people who have a disability, skin ailment or rough palms.
You can alternatively use a rubber glove with some water based lube like you’d lube a pocket pussy, which is wonderful at titillating the frenulum (the underside and most sensitive part of a man’s penis that should never be ignored).
Warning: be cautious and clinically hygienic if using raw red meat. However, there are no exposed mucous membranes on the penis for meat juice to seep into (yup, not nice thought), but should you have a cut or an abrasion, do not apply this method.
And for obvious reasons, never use a vacuum cleaner.
Bottom line
Hopefully, if you’ve been searching for ways on how to make a homemade vagina, then these 12 DIY methods should help replicate the experience of sinking your loved one into a moist warm pleasure tunnel.
For something ultimately better however – more succulent, self-moisturizing, independently moving and ergonomic, you can try an affordable fleshlight.
However, closer to the real McCoy, if you desperately require something even more lifelike, then you are on the path to dolls!
Take a peek here should you be curious.
(This vid was downloaded from here. Mature content requires age verification that incurs extra time & cannot be played here, however in this vid there is no nudity or graphic content fyi. Thank you Sexplanations).
